This article is in response to an article called, “Why I’ll Never Date A Feminist” by Dave Hon. I was casually scrolling through Twitter when I saw that Never Date A Feminist was trending. Intrigued, I clicked on it knowing very well what I getting myself into and saw several people tweeting about this article. I read it and decided to write a blog post about it.
If you look for a reason to hate feminists, chances are you’re going to find it. The truth is, I don’t blame Dave. He’s been fed outdated stereotypes about feminists that are frankly an eye-roll. Bra burning, lesbian, man haters who don’t shave their armpits? Yawn! I’ve heard it all before. He talks about the wage gap and rape culture on college campuses as if they don’t exist, but they do. Please see “4 Reasons Why the Wage Gap Isn’t a Myth” by Marina Watanabe and Kat Blaque’s video “What is Rape Culture?”
There are several issues in this article that I “really, really disagree” with. However, there is one thing that we can agree on: the justice system also fails men. Men are also victims of sexual assault and rape as is evident with the endless number of articles on Everyday Feminism on male rape survivors. Men, specifically black men, are far more likely to go to prison. An article called “What Are the Odds You’ll Go to Prison?” talks about how 1 out of 3 black men are more likely to be sent to prison versus white men where the ratio is only 1 out of 17.
He linked an article called “Father’s Rights and Abortion.” I could list a million different reasons as to why a woman might consider an abortion, but I won’t because it doesn’t fucking matter. Women are more than capable of making their own decisions without having to consult their partners. Of course, they can if they choose to, but they shouldn’t have to ask for permission.
Earlier in the article he makes a bold statement saying that, “People who are more loyal to their gender and not their significant other don’t make good partners.” You’re damn right I am loyal to myself and yes that includes my gender. That also includes my sexuality, race, abilities, flaws, and everything else about me. You cannot have one part of me without the others. It’s nonnegotiable and if a potential partner believes that doesn’t make me a “good partner” then “I’m on to the next one,” as Jay-Z said.
At the end of the day, this is a sad and disgusting article written by a privileged, white, heterosexual cisgendered man who feels as though women owe him something. We don’t. That is why a feminist will never date you, not because you’re male, but because you’re a self-entitled asshole.
Alexis Renae Griggs
Derogatory, Hypocritical, and Vindictive Third-Wave Feminist